I've been half-awake for continously 2days @05.15am w th feeble intention of attending school, can you believe it? but in th end, i didn't attend even though i was awake. esp today, i can't get back to sleep and i end up re-reading 3 or 4 books borrowed from th library -_- th aspect of going to school, getting ignored by those people and 'guailan' by some others , is totally unappealing.
er, wait, guailan is a harsh word. but idk what to use. verbally fighting, teasingly? geddit? O_O it was fun, but somehow not enough for me. as in, it's often but not always. i need someth more consistent.
wteva~ but since during last match's (w Dunman High) debrief when coach says no more trainings, it strucked me. what am i gna do?! faggotzxc. i realised i'm lost. no more expectations to live up to, no more torturous running, no more losing fats and building stamina and most importantly, NO MORE FUN. life's boring. you can't believe how happy i am just by reading books and doing exercise in assessment books that only contains fiction nowadays -__- (me adore fantasy, fairytales, magic and happy ending like every lil' innocent girl)
and everyday, i'm just daydreaming abt th day when i finally moved out w my brothers. where we begin our new life, of course not forgetting momma. but then again, it's daydream.
